"I will give thanks to you O Lord with all my heart; I will tell of all your wonderful deeds."
Psalm 1:9
It has been more than 20 years since I lived in a
home where love came at a cost, and where I was frequently reminded
that I would never amount to anything. I moved out of my parents' home
at the age of 17, never to return. As much as I felt like I was alone
in this world, I knew for a fact that the Lord had His eye on me.
Looking back, I believe that all throughout my childhood he
strategically placed grown ups in my life, to love, and care for me.
People who prayed for me, and never hesitated to tell me the good they
saw in me. To me, they were Jesus with skin on. They were the example I
followed of what it meant to love Him, and live a life that was
pleasing to Him. The relationships I had with friends' parents, camp
counselors, and staff, teachers, and peers helped me to both
see and
feel the
love of my Father. Through them, I came to see that I wasn't alone in
this world. I have no doubt that it is because of the love of these
people, and their involvement in my life, whether face to face, or
simply through their prayers, that I am who I am today. Sometimes I
look around me, and I am overcome with thanksgiving for all that I have,
and all that I have become when my life could have turned out so
differently. I should have been the girl looking for love in all the
wrong places, the one who was broken and scared, and took out her rage
on others. I should have been anything but the woman I am today,
blessed beyond measure. I have a husband who loves me, and does his
very best to ensure that I know it. I have three beautiful girls who,
in my opinion are walking, talking miracles. I have women in my life
who know me, really know me. They love, and encourage me. They
challenge me when they know I need it, and they aren't afraid to let me
know when I'm being too hard on myself, or others. I have Spiritual
gifts, that I am able to use to encourage, and influence the world
around me to the benefit of the Kingdom of Heaven. I know that I am not
perfect. I can drive my husband crazy with my nagging, and all my list
making. I can exasperate my kids in the same way. And my tongue has
been known to get me into trouble on more than one occasion, with more
than one friend.
With
the patience and forgiveness of friends, and family, and the promise of
my Lord that his mercies are new every morning (Lamentation 3:22-23). I
will continue to believe the promise, the promise the Lord gives in
Jeremiah 33:3 that says when we call on Him, He is sure to answer us. I
am living my dream. This life of mine, with all it's the ups and the
downs, all it's joys and disappointments, was once only a dream, but now
is a reality. I am oh, so grateful I get to live it. It all began
with prayer. My prayers, and the prayers of the many who came and went
in my life. If you happen to recognize yourself in some aspect of my
story, be encouraged. Know that the Lord is with you. He promises to
never leave you. He hears your prayers, and knows how all the pieces of
the puzzle fit together. He has a plan. If perhaps you are the one
praying for the 'wondering soul', know that your prayers do not fall on
deaf ears. Change will come, the 'wanderer may not yet know it, but it
is the power of your prayers that is just the very thing of which they
are in desperate need. You are becoming part of their story, quite
possibly, their dream come true.
"To
the one who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine,
according to his power, that is at work within us, to Him be the
glory..." Ephesians 3:20-21.
